The Intelligence Estimate

Jen and I became the proud owners of a couch and chair a few weeks ago. This set off a frenzy of activity centered around finding the right rug to match the couch. It's easier to navigate the ocean using a sextent and the stars than it is to find a rug that matches this couch. So we finally broke down and decided to purchase the rug that came with our furniture set...

Friday, August 25- I made a phone call to Wickes Furniture to add a rug to our account. I spoke with Suzanna. I told her about our previous purchase and that we wanted the rug that went with the set.

"We certainly can add that to your bill," she said, "what rug would you like?"

A bit baffled by her lack of attention, I reiterated that it was the one that came with the set. This seemed to confuse her more.

"What does it looked like?"

Like a bigger version of the tiny rug in the picture of our furniture set, or exactly like the one that was under the coffee table that that picture of the rug was sitting on.

It's navy blue with concentric circles of differing colors, I said.

I'm not sure if it was her first day on the job or if the use of the word "concentric" confused her or if perhaps someone with a shiny ring of keys walked by and distracted her but she still didn't get it.

I said we ordered the Cafe Du Monde couch and chair in cranberry and there was a rug in the set that came with it.

"Sort of a green sateen?" she offered meekly.

No, I said yet again, it's blue with concentric circles.

"Uh-huh."

She said she would go check the floor model and call me right back.

How hard can this be, I wondered? Just look at the model we have and give us the rug that comes with it. Simple. Well, the only thing simple in this equation was Suzanna. I gave her my cell number and never heard from her again.

I talked to my wife Jen later that night and she told me that she had received a call from Wickes. Apparently Suzanna had, lost my cell number (more shiny keys I imagine) and called the home phone number that was on our account. She said they didn't have the rug we wanted in stock but we could order it from their warehouse in the suburbs. They would even bump $50 off the price because they were discontinuing that line.

What color is the rug?

"I didn't ask," Jen said. "Why?"

Because Suzanna didn't seem to know which rug we wanted...or which way was up. I'll call them later and ask.

Big mistake.

Be sure to tune in next time for Episode 2, Attack of the Clowns when we'll hear our beloved hero say, "you're sure about that, right?"

Labels: Anger, Rug, Saga, Wickes Furniture