Two weeks ago I was exercising in my living room with the "help" of Nintendo's Wii Fit. When it came time to weigh myself at the end of my session I was told that the Wii balance board was out of battery power and the only way to proceed was to change the batteries immediately. "No problem," I thought. "I'll burn off more calories looking for batteries and show this thing who's boss.
I got batteries and put them in the bottom of the balance board, turned it on and carefully flipped it over. The screen beeped at me. That's when I noticed that the weight of my hand on the board and the motion of the board hitting the floor registered as my weight, 0.62 lbs.
Apparently the extra weight I burned off looking for those batteries was beneficial in ways I even now can't comprehend.
Suddenly the screen started congratulating me on meeting my weight loss goal (to lose 20 lbs in a year) ahead of schedule. It didn't seem to concerned that the Wiimote weighs more than 0.62 lbs. It also didn't wonder about how I had gone about losing an amazing 216 pounds in the course of ONE WORK OUT. Details.
Then it suggested that I make a NEW workout goal. It suggested that 0.62 pounds may be a dangerous weight to be at so why not try building up some muscle mass? Why not indeed. At a little more than half a pound I should have no trouble finding heavy things to lift.
It would not let me advance any further or take my weight measurement again until I had made a new goal. Now being a game geared toward fat Americans it would not allow me to make a goal of GAINING weight. So the only goal I could choose from their menu was to MAINTAIN MY CURRENT WEIGHT. And the shortest time frame they gave me was 2 weeks. So That's the goal I made.
I then went back to take my weight measurement again. This time it measured me correctly and was simply appalled that I had gained 216 pounds since our last measurement.
So in the world according to Wii Fit you can never be too thin. Losing 216 pounds in a half an hour is commendable. Gaining 216 pounds in 3 minutes is shocking.
Imagine its disappointment today when I weighed myself again and, despite having lost a few pound in the intervening 2 weeks, I still hadn't maintained my old fighting weight of 0.62 pounds. But I am back on the trail. I am eating lightning and crapping thunder and one day I will be a contender again!
Labels: Video Games, Weight, Weight Loss, Wii Fit
