The Intelligence Estimate

I was listening to a segment on NPR this morning concerning technology, specifically broadcasting/streaming television to your PC. During the interview I heard two things that made me want to jump in a hole with a copy of WIRED magazine and never come out.

1. "I have like 5 remote controls and I can't run any of them." -Interviewer
2. "A lot of people are on the internet" -Interviewee

What? It was like they were broadcasting from another TIME...like 1983. I fully expected to hear an ad for Reagan's presidential campaign.

You have 5 remotes and you don't know how to run ANY of them? You don't deserve technology, go back to your flint and tinder. You'll be much happier in your cave. Honestly, go home. The other troglodytes miss you.

And a lot of people are on the internet? Hmmmmm...maybe, but I think it's just a fad. (But tune into my next BLOG to find out if that's REALLY the case!) Yeah, any moment this internet bubble's gonna burst and people will actually have to talk to one another again! And write letters, and shop in stores and purchase their porn from a swarthy guy in a shady part of town who answers to the name of Cool Killa B.

It wasn't so much that those statements were ridiculous (which they were) as that they were such hackneyed stand-up comedy premises. Do their VCRs still flash 12:00? And what about that airline food, huh? Men and women are sure different aren't they? But not as different as New York and LA, am I right or am I right? Thanks! You guys have been great. Seriously. Of all of the audiences I've had, you're one of them! Good night, folks! Don't forget to tip the wait staff!

*A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" Aren't you glad you read all the way to the bottom?