The Intelligence Estimate

I've been working a lot lately. That's part of the reason that it's been like four days since I've written. (The other part is that the Blogger site was down for like a day and a half!) But here's what I've noticed about working long hours with strangers: the longer you're together, the stranger they become. And you usually end up talking about grossly inappropriate stuff that seems perfectly normal at the time until you try to relate it to someone who wasn't there.

Don't bother to try to relive the moment, nobody cares and they won't get it anyway. Just give up. It NEVER works. People will just want to know WHY you were talking about mentally handicapped pole dancers and what the conversation was that lead up to that point. And you NEVER remember what lead up to that point. So save yourself the embarassment and skip it!

And while we're on the subject of stories no one wants to hear let me give you this little piece of advice: lie! When you see the audience waning start making stuff up. Spice it up a little. There are three things that can make any story better a) hookers b) monkies and c) fire! A bad story that no one is listening to will suddenly become interesting if monkies show up.

And for the record, a hooker monkey on fire is the PERFECT story!