The Intelligence Estimate

I saw a sign at the drug store today that confused me. It said "New Hispanic Product In Aisle 10." It was the "new Hispanic product" part of it that got me. A product for people who are newly Hispanic? That doesn't make sense. A new product aimed at Hispanics? Maybe. A new product that is made BY Hispanics? Also possible, but no matter how you parsed that sentence it just raised more questions. Too many questions. So I decided to make my way over to aisle 10 and put my questions to rest.

Well finding aisle 10 turned out to be harder than I thought. The signs above the aisles only go to 9 and beyond aisle 9 is the liquor section. I began to panic that some half-witted manager got scared by the 400,000 people at immigration rights rally downtown yesterday and decided to start awkwardly marketing tequila to the Hispanic population as though he just discovered it.

I finally stumbled on aisle 10 (which was hiding behind aisle 1. It's always the last place you look!) and it was the hair care aisle. I never did find this miracle product, but if this is how hard they have to work to get a good shampoo plus conditioner then immigrants may want to reconsider coming to this country in the first place. I mean, how many people will have to clog the Loop before they can get a good moisturizer? The mind reels. No wonder they need the tequila.